[Ibogaine] For Val et al
jeffgallop at gmail.com
Sun Nov 17 10:14:19 CST 2013
Yes it sucks.
That guy of yours had a lot on his plate, and now even more.
That's why you need to try and be present for him, really present, not just
seemingly there, while actually numb.
I KNOW all too well how it seems that if your not feeling good, not
opiated in our case, it feels like we are useless to him, or those who need
us, but that's not the case.
You will be surprised how you can rise to the occasion. His dad just died,
you loved him and love your man.....it's supposed to suck and hurt, your
supposed to cry....
And your supposed to do the best you can to help each other through it.
Just the best you can, that will be enough.
I kind of feel like an asshole, cuz it sounds like I know this and practice
it. I do not know much of anything and struggle everyday.
My son is hurting now and even after everything I've been through for over
twenty years with him, I still find myself thinking that doing some dope
or whatever will help me help him.....but I finally see that it is just an
excuse to help me feel better about my own guilt about of his pain...
Me feeling better will not help him.
If I didn't finally get that even a little I would have picked up already.
For me it's been the toughest lesson to learn, but I feel like I kind of,
maybe, at least for now, have....
So I only write these words to you hoping that maybe they will resonate
with you and save you many many years of pain.
Peace to you and your man.
On Nov 16, 2013 12:44 AM, "Valarie" <val.needis at gmail.com> wrote:
> Thanks Jeff. My life has just got so incredibly hard. Anyways I got some
> kratom at a head shop I do feel better, I am not taking a lot, but now I'm
> getting paranoid that my dose will most likely be increasing which will
> lead to a seizure so I am going to have to stop. It all about my bf right
> now. This sucks!
> On Nov 15, 2013 12:58 PM, "Sergey Sibirian" <sibirianfox at gmail.com> wrote:
>> I really like that.
>> On Fri, Nov 15, 2013 at 9:00 AM, Jeff G <jeffgallop at gmail.com> wrote:
>>> From what I wrote in a long email to Danielle yesterday....
>>> Life is hard
>>> People die
>>> Our bodies hurt
>>> We age
>>> We get angry
>>> People screw us over
>>> People we love have pain and suffering.
>>> But all being addicted to opiates does is make that seemingly alright,
>>> it doesn't make it not happen.
>>> And it doesn't make it alright.
>>> And when people die we are supposed to hurt
>>> And recovering from that is how we grow I guess.
>>> And when people fuck us over or hurt us, it's supposed to sting, we are
>>> supposed to cry....and then move on, it's how we grow, I hope.
>>> And when people we love hurt, we try our best to help them, I think
>>> that's how we best help ourselves....
>>> You get the idea, me I'm still working on it....
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