[Ibogaine] From Randy:

Jeremy Spence jlspence12 at gmail.com
Mon Feb 22 02:02:22 EST 2010


I am from Evansville, IN
its not that bad here as far as drugs go...

My problems been pain.. its the other way over here... too straight  
laced...
I don't wish it to be the other way either..

But get pain meds here is a problem at times.
it extremely hard to get pain meds here at times.. it drives me nuts..
I get them..
But the state just makes it nearly impossible though, it pisses me off..

I wish for a balance, but in humans, that's pretty hard to do..
i am working with natural stuff to get my illness better.. its  
helping, but its slow..

I am on less meds as far as pain meds..

I never thought that is was all good all over KY.

I am talking deep in KY, nice to see the country side..

People think the same about my town... until they live here.. meth a  
big problem here.. I tend to not blame it on the MD's or the drugs..  
people do what they do..
People need to take responsibly for them getting all fucked up on  
drugs... and not blame the MD's or the drugs..

I am sick of people blaming the "drug" or "the doctor" people kill  
their own selfs...
I don't like the "blame game"

I got friends who have od'd too.. and its sad, some of them were scum  
though and i don't miss their fucked up asses...

Some of them did not deserve to die the way they did...
But in the end, people do what they do... and some of them don't make  
it pass their 20's and that's sad shit..
it happens though..

We all going to die one day anyway... but yes its sad that too many  
people die too young.. but people die.. every day.... That's life....
I would not be a part of it...
But people die, its a fact of life..

I its really hard for me to feel sorry for the people who choose it..  
because in the end, its a choice to "abuse" you meds... or od, for the  
most part..
and it makes all the people like me,

that didn't "choose" my disease look bad..

But I am not getting into that... people do what the fuck people do...  
I don't get into, oh you did that, oh you do that drug... I don't get  
into all that bull shit..
the thing that does piss me off is when people screw the living day  
lights out of people by fucking people over, and then blame it all on  
"the drugs" in front of a judge.
That gets me pissed the fuck off...

I understand drugs and change you some and some times you don't think  
straight all fucked up, I have been there, I use to use via IV(I don't  
now, I use my meds in a sane fashion)
But I never fucked the shit out of people the way I have seen people  
do people..
That's why i don't have many "friends" because nobody seems to know  
how to not screw the other to death... sadly....

I figured out I am better off alone, SADLY, then around people..

its made me extremely untrusting of most human beings... Sadly...

But I know just what you mean when you say stuff like that.. People  
think Evansville a real Clean town... yea, until you get your ass  
jacked the fuck up!! or CLEANED THE FUCK OUT!!
this town something else...

I just got back for the gas station only to find my gas cap got taken  
right off the top of my car... fucking unbelievable... fucking ass  
holes...
people are fucked...
I have always hated this town.. its so sicking at times.. just shit  
like that... fucking unreal....

people here are fucked like that..
it just enough to piss me off..

I trust no one in this stupid ass river town... NO ONE!

JLS


On Feb 21, 2010, at 11:18 PM, Jessica Blackburn wrote:

> Kentucky looks like a really nice, unaffected place to someone who  
> hasnt lived there. Sadly, Kentucky has one of the largest  
> percentages of drug addicted people in the nation. I was born and  
> raised in Pikeville KY, lived there for 22 years and became addicted  
> to drugs there. KY doesnt have much heroin, or any street drugs for  
> that matter (at least in the rural areas) except for pot. The big  
> problem is pharmaceuticals, and corrupt doctors and law enforcement  
> that take part in the money making. Pain clinics are on every  
> corner, in every strip mall, over-prescribing oxycodone, fentanyl,  
> and a whole slew of other narcotics. I dont know if you are both  
> from KY, but if either of you are still in the state, even visiting,  
> spread the word about ibogaine. One third of my graduating class  
> from 2004 is dead from overdose, the other half are in jail, or  
> addicted to drugs. I wish that I could reach more people from home,  
> and help them, but I am very far away. If someone is in KY for an ex
> tended period of time, I would love to coordinate and try to reach  
> some people there who were interested in ibogaine after hearing that  
> I got clean with it. Let me know :)
> Jessica
>
> On Feb 21, 2010, at 9:04 PM, Jeremy Spence wrote:
>
>> Kentucky,
>> Don't u just U love our two states :0)...........
>>
>> No, there are not too bad, as long as your not "different" or can't  
>> conform, then, yea, its a kind of a problem...
>>
>> Your right Brad, and it wouldn't be so bad, it it was not for the  
>> fact that I got the strange, can't tell by looking at me, like  
>> everybody thinks you can, idiot brains...
>> That's what's made my life here hard...
>>
>> But fuck it..
>> I really don't care anymore, it is what the fuck it is.. and i  
>> really do not fuck that much of a fuck anymore..
>> Kentucky got some nice rolling hills...
>> its a got beautiful country side..
>>
>> I went deep south into Ky with my mother and step dad, and we got  
>> some herbs from the Amish.
>>
>> You know I use to always think the Amish were crazy... and you know  
>> what i found out... "we city people, with all are little or (big if  
>> you want to call some things that are "laws" that don't seem to  
>> help or stop anything I can see.) But yea, I found out, "we are the  
>> one that are crazy"  its not them.... "we with are overly social  
>> control city style of bs..." we are the crazy people..
>> They are just living there life's.
>>
>> They don't deal with mass shooting like we do... That don't seem to  
>> have drug problems either.... not like the city people do.... They  
>> also do not seek this high that us city people do..... and well  
>> over socialized world does.. I told my mother, you know if the  
>> Amish have a earth quake, guess what, life goes on as usual
>>
>> My mother beat breast cancer by going to the herb guy over there,  
>> he stop doing it, sending it out, you have to go there and get it,  
>> and they only deal in cash now.. I forget the place, His name is  
>> Ruben, its deep in Ky, in, where the hills roll, like I never seen  
>> in my life, its truly something to see if you go there.. its  
>> beautiful country side, it truly is..
>>
>> My mother is doing good, but I have told her, you don't want it to  
>> come back on you, I've had my cond come back on me 3 different  
>> times, and every time it came back worse....
>> But she doing good, she beat it all natural, but i told her, don't  
>> think its gone...
>> its easy for people to think something is gone and it come back and  
>> take them out..
>>
>> if and When I get better from my IC, I am never going to believe  
>> its gone, its just managed, I don't ever want to end up at the  
>> mercy of  the damm MDs... I am sorry I don't.. its not a great  
>> place to be...
>> MDs do what they do, they have a impossible job at times..I am  
>> trying very hard not to hate them..  They do what MD's do...  I am  
>> just getting over that fact of life..
>> However, I just don't want to be at their mercy that's all...
>>
>> You seem like a good guy Randy....
>> It be nice to get treated by you or your son.. Your the closest to  
>> me that anybody is on the list... I don't know how deep you are in  
>> KY?
>> its got wide open land, its nice to see there there are still parts  
>> of america still not fucked with too much by man...
>>
>> To bad we can't seem to get people to do the same with the  
>> rainforest....
>> I am for saving the rainforest.
>>
>> The drug war is killing the rainforest by pushing coca other oldies  
>> but goodies into the rainforest for protection but its end up  
>> ruining the land, by all type of shit, police raids, and people  
>> growing the shit just not giving a fuck about how they get rid of  
>> the chemicals use to get the coca leafs into cocaine...
>>
>> I watch something on the internet how the Pres. Bush policy have  
>> fucked up the rainforest, WHAT A DUMB ASS!!! CHENNY TOO!!! I HATE  
>> THEM BOTH!! CHENNY WAS TOO GOOD TO GO TO WAR...
>> BUT HE DOESN'T SEEM TO MIND ORDERING PEOPLE TO DO FOR THE CAUSE NOW  
>> DOES HE??
>>
>> YEA, THEY BOTH PISS ME OFF!!
>> I DON'T LIKE THE VICE PRES. EITHER(THE ONE WE GOT NOW.. BOTH OF  
>> THEM ARE IDIOTS!)
>> DON'T I LIKE THE ONE WE GOT GOT BETTER THEN THE LAST..
>>
>> I WOULD BET THE ONE WE GOT NOW, MIGHT JUST GET OUT AND FIGHT IF WE  
>> HAD WAR HERE, BIG TALKING CHENNY WOULD BE IN A BOMB SHELTER!!
>> BUSH MIGHT ACTUALLY GET OUT AND FIGHT..
>>
>> OBAMA for some reason I got some hope with this pres.. that maybe  
>> one day things will change over here..
>> I can live with hope....
>>
>> yea, I think he fucking up are dollar, and econ. is going to hell a  
>> bit...
>> I really hope Obama can pill something out of his ass...
>>
>> it be nice to see, just so people would shut the fuck up about  
>> him....
>> he told the DEA to fuck off and no pres. in US history has done  
>> that... that's one hell of a thing to do him I think....
>> But if it were me, I tell them to fuck off completely and DEA  
>> agents would be doing some building jumping, WHAT COMES AROUND GOES  
>> AROUD MOTHER FUCKERS!!
>> I DON'T LIKE THEM....
>>
>> WHEN I FED JUDGE GETS OVER RULED BY "ONE" AGENCY, ITS COMPLETELY  
>> GOES AGAIN EVERY THING OUR FORTH FATHERS FOUGHT ON THE BLOOD FILLED  
>> BATTLE FEILD...
>> IT SHOULD BE...  ITS NOT RIGHT.. AND ITS UNCONSTITUTIONAL, ITS NOT  
>> RIGHT.... IT OVER RIDES THE CHECKS AND BALANCES IN THIS COUNTRY...
>> IT REALLY DOES...
>>
>> I am not sure I am for completely over riding all the drug laws,  
>> but I think it needs to turn to one of "harm reduction..."  Locking  
>> people up for what they choose to  ingest in their bodies is  
>> fucked...
>> But again, I don't like the idea of people fucking their bodies to  
>> shit either...
>>
>> The answer is kind of hard.. But if you take away freedom, then  
>> people are left with nothing. and what all the wars were fought  
>> over mean nothing...
>>
>> JLS
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> On Feb 21, 2010, at 9:44 PM, fallen eden wrote:
>>> Randy asked me to post his message saying "HEY Y'ALL!"
>>>
>>> "I'm finally home in Kentucky and I got no internet connection..  
>>> but I'll catch up with y'all when I get back! Maybe a cricket  
>>> thing, one of those wireless cards. I'm doing real good since the  
>>> treatment, and I love you all. Gonna do a booster or two here  
>>> soon! Oh, and me and D made up, we're cool now."
>>>
>>> Randy sends his love.. apparently he's got no internet at the  
>>> moment, and really wanted to tell everybody on the list that he  
>>> loves you!
>>>
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