[Ibogaine] Ibogaine Digest, Vol 7, Issue 84

simon loxton simonloxton at yahoo.co.uk
Sun Mar 23 10:35:38 EDT 2008


That was a much better reply than mine Randy; much more sensitive.



----- Original Message ----
From: Randy Faulconer <bicuitboy714 at gmail.com>
To: The Ibogaine List <ibogaine at mindvox.com>
Sent: Sunday, 23 March, 2008 4:11:44 PM
Subject: Re: [Ibogaine] Ibogaine Digest, Vol 7, Issue 84

      Hello Valerie, I feel you here. I'm not the one who was
describing that experience, it was Luke.

      You sound like such a sensitive person, with such a good heart.
Sometimes it's hard to live amongst people who have no feeling for
others. Your daughter sounds like someone who is looking for
themselves. It's hard for kids nowadays. My son is struggling too.

      I'd say listen to your spirit guides. You and them will know if
Ibo is going to be right, and when to do it if at all. Keep searching
and talking to us.

      Peace Love and The Search

On 3/22/08, valerie <ouivalerie at yahoo.com> wrote:
> Did they have the ibogaine in the city of Venice, Italy? I didn't know
> there was a place there. I would like to know where it is for my best friend
> needing ibogaine bad, and no relief in sight yet.
> This trip of Randy's sounds as bad as most of my dreams. I do get good
> dreams from time to time, but they are mostly like that depressing AND I
> wake up unhappy, unfullfilled, disturbed..... It doesn't always take
> ibogaine or LSD to get a trip, it happens to me once in a while anyway...and
> it's a lot of gloom, in the world, the world is full of problems and
> disappointed people, and people not treating each other right. Point blank,
> people could be doing better.. They know not what they do. I'm thinking, I
> can try and treat people better and act better and this helps...it's such a
> troubled would, I think it is hard to live because it's hard to find the
> way, among all the rottenness we don't think we should have to put up with.
> For example many people do bad things, and they don't think those things are
> bad, and if I tell them, they call me judgemental, or that's my opinion, and
> maybe people don't want to be what they can be, and want to be a famous
> movie star instead of
> a local street performer, and it's get's far worse on drugs. They put my
> daughter on Prozac, etc., and she jumped off a cliff! Now she's unhappy
> because she broke her pelvis and busted out her jaw! She was a natural
> ventroliquist and hated the gift, ignored it and wanted to be a rapper and
> find Emminem, and be famous, going that hard long road, the remote
> possibility existed, just made it take so long to get there she couldn't
> wait...like a person dumped by a mate they love and they wait and eventually
> give it up and move on.
> I think it's easier to find the way, if you stay clean and straight, and
> use your instincts. I tried a few times to take a few doses of Valium, and
> drove through stop signs. When I was 16 I drank and drove and was stopped
> by the police, he let me go...that was before they made and DWI laws. I
> made mistakes on those drugs and alcohol, there's bound to be my karma from
> this down the road, it was my choice and body and mistake. No major
> tragedy, but still people didn't get treated very good when I was mistaken
> or blocking out signals or operating machinery intoxicated.....so my
> boyfriend has the strongest sensitivity one can imagine, and he's dead wrong
> on some things he thought was okay to do. For example, he had a lot of
> partners in the past, and the price to pay with some of them not wanting to
> let him go was have to run away and be lost to have all that freedom of
> choice and go against religion, etc. In the end the rules may be wrong but
> going against them can make
> too much problem for your loved ones. Fighting Christian Morals is like
> Fighting drug laws and is like fighting city hall. Secrets to do things
> anyway can be a problem too. So while all seems really bad, it's not so
> bad, just CAN'T WORK for some reason. I don't have all the answers, and I
> need other people, and if all else fails my spirit guides help with signs,
> you know what they said about ibogaine they said "F*** OFF" and I was
> disappointed, but they were saying it for a reason, and I don't question
> them all the time, it's often just what's best in the moment. I can be in a
> bad situation and there are never enough good moments to live for, and my
> whole life needs to go someplace else too.
> Love,
> ouivalerie
>
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> Today's Topics:
>
> 1. Re: Ibo Experience (Luke Christoffersen)
> 2. test (Beatriz)
> 3. World Psychedelic Forum (Jeff Black)
> 4. Re: World Psychedelic Forum (simon loxton)
> 5. Re: Ibo Experience (Randy Faulconer)
>
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Message: 1
> Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2008 23:46:51 +0000
> From: "Luke Christoffersen"
> Subject: Re: [Ibogaine] Ibo Experience
> To: "The Ibogaine List"
> Message-ID:
> <4c90d90803211646y2be9203fq2240b90f1d861fc9 at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
>
> Hi Randy,
> You can use my account below :
>
>
> I was disappointed with my first ibogaine experience as I felt that my
> way to deeper childhood things i was interested in resolving were blocked
> and I spend a lot of time wandering through things from my adult life. An
> iron gate came down saying CLOSED which seemed to be the theme, I came to
> some big strong
> walls which I tried to harrass to find a way through but to no avail. I
> hindsight I did see my father but I avoided him.
>
> In my subsequent treatment I went through some very deep material
> that changed me deeply. It often began with me feeling very afraid as
> the transition to this different level of consciousness was a bit
> jarring. Time seemed to slow to a point where it didn't seem to move
> at all. Sometimes it felt like being connected to super consciousness
> or a much higher awareness.
>
> I would find myself journeying through strange landscapes meeting
> strange people, African people, some I could commune with and ask
> directions. at some point I would find myself traveling back to my
> childhood.
>
> Sometimes painful sad scenes would repeat themselves over and over.
> At times it felt like I was in a coma or a dream but aware, observing
> and feeling the scenes without any perception of time.
>
> Some of the earlier stuff was more symbolic. I saw my father and he
> died and became a skeleton. It seemed so real, the feeling of pain and
> loss.
>
> I remember meeting my childhood self and I asked him to come to me and
> he jumped into me and then many childhood scenes washed through me.
> Sometimes it was like watching the scenes from the outside, they were
> played out before me. I'd see the arguments with my parents maybe
> hundreds of scenes. I couldn't count them. There were many frightening
> and sad scenes from early childhood.
>
> There was a point after going through a long period of catharsis that
> I saw my wounds being bandaged over. That's the only way I can put
> it. I remember asking can that be done and I watched how the energy
> went around my body smoothing over some of the wounds that remained to
> be healed.
>
> Sometimes I would be taken away from childhood and shown different
> things about humanity. I was taken to a place where I was shown a
> place where people lived contently without violence or pointless
> conflict. They seemed to live simple lives but I watched how they
> interacted and lived. Then I was shown how they would die and their
> loved ones would look to the sky and wonder. It was sad. There was no
> answer for it.
>
> I was shown myself how I functioned as an animal. I was brought to
> deep despair and hopelessness. I looked into the blackness of death
> at one point. I decided not to go there but was still brought into
> much despair and hopelessness and heavy feelings. I felt that I
> wasn't loved and so I was of no use in loving anybody else. How could
> I be of any use to love someone if I was so deeply lacking and needy.
> I always seemed to need someone else to show me love before I could
> love them back. It was so all pervading that I thought I would remaind
> that way when the ibogaine wore off. How will I live I thought?
> Eventually thought it began to dissipate.
>
> I remember feeling emptied out afterwards and changed deeply I
> marveled at the change in my behaviour.. There was a lot of anger
> released which was one of my goals for a particular treatment and it
> often seemed like I couldn't get angry even if I tried. I had began to
> spill over with anger previous to this and fell out with
> some friends and I woman I was trying to start a relationship with.
> I never got to rekindle that relationship and I began to see that I
> was projecting a lot of childhood stuff onto her and didn't know if I
> wanted that relationship anymore.
>
> On whole my experience lasted about 36 hours, though it felt like a
> lot longer, after which I found myself to have an enormous amount of
> energy for the next week about and would need much less sleep. AT one
> point I was terribly anxious and wanted to sleep but couldn't. I
> wanted to get on a plane home but my flight wasn't for a few days and
> I was alone in a hotel in another country for the following nights. I
> took an antidepressant which helped and I enjoyed the rest of my stay
> looking around the city of Venice.
>
>
>
>
> On Sat, Mar 15, 2008 at 2:05 PM, Randy Faulconer
> wrote:
>
> > Hey yalls, I just want to send out a message to those of you who
> > wouldn't mind sharing your Ibo experience with me and the list. As you
> know
> > Marko and I have been tossing around the idea of getting data and info
> about
> > Ibo together so as to make some kind of package of information to show
> > around to doc's, shrinks, lawyers, clinic heads, junkies, and whack jobs
> > like me. If ya's don't mind I'd like to read some experiences and see any
> > data that yall think would be good in this enterprise. It will be good for
> > shits and giggles anyway.
> >
> > Peace Love and Space Ship Rides
> > Randy
> >
> >
> > -=[) ::::::: MindVox | Ibogaine | List Commands ::::::: (]=-
> > (][%] :: http://mindvox.com/mailman/listinfo/ibogaine :: [%][)
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> >
> >
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> Message: 2
> Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2008 09:16:31 +0800
> From: "Beatriz"
> Subject: [Ibogaine] test
> To: "'The Ibogaine List'"
> Message-ID: <003b01c88bba$5d312960$0600020a at IBM4A0955FF8C3>
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> Message: 3
> Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2008 09:53:34 +0000
> From: "Jeff Black"
> Subject: [Ibogaine] World Psychedelic Forum
> To: ibogaine at mindvox.com
> Message-ID:
> <807430280803220253o2f34c13bvf076ff8a51c96e71 at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
>
> Fairly disappointing showing so far for ibogaine at the Basel event. I heard
> from another attendee that a MAPS follow up to study the long term
> effectiveness of ibogaine was incomplete and inconclusive. So far they have
> contacted 5 people of whom only one managed to stay clean. I'm not sure if
> this was Valerie's session or another of the MAPS sessions (they have a lot
> on the program). I was going to attend Valerie's session - to support the
> cause - but when I looked in there were only about 20 people - it looked
> kind of miserable, so I went to see Dennis McKenna instead. I have a feeling
> that Daniel Pinchbeck, love him or hate him, may do a better job
> evangelizing Iboga, judging from his 10 minute introduction this morning.
> I'm going to his full session later.
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> Message: 4
> Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2008 11:15:17 +0000 (GMT)
> From: simon loxton
> Subject: Re: [Ibogaine] World Psychedelic Forum
> To: The Ibogaine List
> Message-ID: <248643.47090.qm at web27614.mail.ukl.yahoo.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"
>
> I think this was one of the problems with Iboga Therapy House; as far as I
> know thew were trying to get the project started with Maps. The last I heard
> was they only had five out of the twenty needed for the study and now it
> seems like its down to four. I am very surprised at the way things are
> turning out; I was under the impression that the number of people going for
> ibogaine treatment had increased. I dont know if it is the same around the
> board but I am also finding it very difficult to get any kind of long term
> feedback from people that have been for treatment. I have gone with the
> theory of it being unethical to chase people up and that it should be
> voluntary; the contribution of information. Even if I do send an emal and
> get a favourable response that all is still well I never get sufficient
> feedback that would be worth contributing to any kind of study of long term
> efficacy of ibogaine treatment even though I think it is the secondary care
> that
> will make the difference here. Its just a pity is all because I thought that
> there was some great potential there; from ITH. I never think ibogaine will
> become a main stream form of treatment but I did think that there were
> enough people who had gone the conventional routs without success to prove a
> point that ibogaine is a valid form of therapy.
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----
> From: Jeff Black
> To: ibogaine at mindvox.com
> Sent: Saturday, 22 March, 2008 11:53:34 AM
> Subject: [Ibogaine] World Psychedelic Forum
>
> Fairly disappointing showing so far for ibogaine at the Basel event. I heard
> from another attendee that a MAPS follow up to study the long term
> effectiveness of ibogaine was incomplete and inconclusive. So far they have
> contacted 5 people of whom only one managed to stay clean. I'm not sure if
> this was Valerie's session or another of the MAPS sessions (they have a lot
> on the program). I was going to attend Valerie's session - to support the
> cause - but when I looked in there were only about 20 people - it looked
> kind of miserable, so I went to see Dennis McKenna instead. I have a feeling
> that Daniel Pinchbeck, love him or hate him, may do a better job
> evangelizing Iboga, judging from his 10 minute introduction this morning.
> I'm going to his full session later.
>
>
> -----Inline Attachment Follows-----
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> ------------------------------
>
> Message: 5
> Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2008 08:48:24 -0400
> From: "Randy Faulconer"
> Subject: Re: [Ibogaine] Ibo Experience
> To: "The Ibogaine List"
> Message-ID:
> <29d165a30803220548y279d7a7am5a28585c10e7e3b6 at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1
>
> Thanx very much Luke. I'm working this all out. It looks like
> this might be a pretty good project after all.
>
> Come on yall...........haven't heard from a bunch of you.
>
> Randy
>
> On 3/21/08, Luke Christoffersen wrote:
> > Hi Randy,
> > You can use my account below :
> >
> >
> > I was disappointed with my first ibogaine experience as I felt that my
> > way to deeper childhood things i was interested in resolving were blocked
> > and I spend a lot of time wandering through things from my adult life. An
> > iron gate came down saying CLOSED which seemed to be the theme, I came to
> > some big strong
> > walls which I tried to harrass to find a way through but to no avail. I
> > hindsight I did see my father but I avoided him.
> >
> > In my subsequent treatment I went through some very deep material
> > that changed me deeply. It often began with me feeling very afraid as
> > the transition to this different level of consciousness was a bit
> > jarring. Time seemed to slow to a point where it didn't seem to move
> > at all. Sometimes it felt like being connected to super consciousness
> > or a much higher awareness.
> >
> > I would find myself journeying through strange landscapes meeting
> > strange people, African people, some I could commune with and ask
> > directions. at some point I would find myself traveling back to my
> > childhood.
> >
> > Sometimes painful sad scenes would repeat themselves over and over.
> > At times it felt like I was in a coma or a dream but aware, observing
> > and feeling the scenes without any perception of time.
> >
> > Some of the earlier stuff was more symbolic. I saw my father and he
> > died and became a skeleton. It seemed so real, the feeling of pain and
> > loss.
> >
> > I remember meeting my childhood self and I asked him to come to me and
> > he jumped into me and then many childhood scenes washed through me.
> > Sometimes it was like watching the scenes from the outside, they were
> > played out before me. I'd see the arguments with my parents maybe
> > hundreds of scenes. I couldn't count them. There were many frightening
> > and sad scenes from early childhood.
> >
> > There was a point after going through a long period of catharsis that
> > I saw my wounds being bandaged over. That's the only way I can put
> > it. I remember asking can that be done and I watched how the energy
> > went around my body smoothing over some of the wounds that remained to
> > be healed.
> >
> > Sometimes I would be taken away from childhood and shown different
> > things about humanity. I was taken to a place where I was shown a
> > place where people lived contently without violence or pointless
> > conflict. They seemed to live simple lives but I watched how they
> > interacted and lived. Then I was shown how they would die and their
> > loved ones would look to the sky and wonder. It was sad. There was no
> > answer for it.
> >
> > I was shown myself how I functioned as an animal. I was brought to
> > deep despair and hopelessness. I looked into the blackness of death
> > at one point. I decided not to go there but was still brought into
> > much despair and hopelessness and heavy feelings. I felt that I
> > wasn't loved and so I was of no use in loving anybody else. How could
> > I be of any use to love someone if I was so deeply lacking and needy.
> > I always seemed to need someone else to show me love before I could
> > love them back. It was so all pervading that I thought I would remaind
> > that way when the ibogaine wore off. How will I live I thought?
> > Eventually thought it began to dissipate.
> >
> > I remember feeling emptied out afterwards and changed deeply I
> > marveled at the change in my behaviour. There was a lot of anger
> > released which was one of my goals for a particular treatment and it
> > often seemed like I couldn't get angry even if I tried. I had began to
> > spill over with anger previous to this and fell out with
> > some friends and I woman I was trying to start a relationship with.
> > I never got to rekindle that relationship and I began to see that I
> > was projecting a lot of childhood stuff onto her and didn't know if I
> > wanted that relationship anymore.
> >
> > On whole my experience lasted about 36 hours, though it felt like a
> > lot longer, after which I found myself to have an enormous amount of
> > energy for the next week about and would need much less sleep. AT one
> > point I was terribly anxious and wanted to sleep but couldn't. I
> > wanted to get on a plane home but my flight wasn't for a few days and
> > I was alone in a hotel in another country for the following nights. I
> > took an antidepressant which helped and I enjoyed the rest of my stay
> > looking around the city of Venice.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > On Sat, Mar 15, 2008 at 2:05 PM, Randy Faulconer
> > wrote:
> >
> > > Hey yalls, I just want to send out a message to those of you who
> > > wouldn't mind sharing your Ibo experience with me and the list. As you
> > know
> > > Marko and I have been tossing around the idea of getting data and info
> > about
> > > Ibo together so as to make some kind of package of information to show
> > > around to doc's, shrinks, lawyers, clinic heads, junkies, and whack jobs
> > > like me. If ya's don't mind I'd like to read some experiences and see
> any
> > > data that yall think would be good in this enterprise. It will be good
> for
> > > shits and giggles anyway.
> > >
> > > Peace Love and Space Ship Rides
> > > Randy
> > >
> > >
> > > -=[) ::::::: MindVox | Ibogaine | List Commands ::::::: (]=-
> > > (][%] :: http://mindvox.com/mailman/listinfo/ibogaine :: [%][)
> > > -=[) :::: Change Account Settings :: [Un]Subscribe :::: (]=-
> > >
> > >
> >
>
>
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>
>
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> End of Ibogaine Digest, Vol 7, Issue 84
> ***************************************
>
>
>
>
>
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