[Ibogaine] Searching

Luke Christoffersen luke.christoffersen at gmail.com
Mon Jun 26 09:23:38 EDT 2006


Warren,
            Thanks for your encouragment.   I was taking alot of
neurofen recently but I think I've managed to stop that at the moment.
I just got a call to do some extra work on a tv series this week.  The
hours are really long, 12 to 14 hours they said.  I hope I can cope.
It was my neck and back pain that led me to using the neurofen, hope
it doesn't get worse. I don't like taking any drugs much anymore, I'm
trying to get back into exercising regularly and be healthy.

Luke

On 6/24/06, Warren Lee Theriot <wleetheriot at comcast.net> wrote:
> Luke,
> I can relate to what sounds like depression. Don't give up that there
> is something beyond the dimension in which you seem to be stuck. I
> know it's a struggle, its worth getting through. Go see a doctor
> about possible depression.  I lost my best of friends and loved ones
> in the last several years and that made it hard to see a happy future
> after. Don't try to kill the pain with opioids if you are clean; they
> only delay the facing up to reality and its is so much a more
> difficult struggle with a  "painful habit" to throw off when it
> backfires someday when the drugs don't work anymore. I can't honestly
> advise you on any drugs for escape.  I hope someone else has some
> good advice. Watch the movie Life of Brian or The Meaning  of Life,
> by Monty Python maybe. Thank your blessings you are not in Iraq for
> another thing.
> Best Wishes,
> Warren
>
> On Jun 23, 2006, at 8:37 PM, Luke Christoffersen wrote:
>
> > I really want to be free of this shit.  I'm half pissed now and I
> > can't take it anymore.  My life is a disaster of which I',m struggling
> > to gain control over.  I'd take anything now booze, heroin, coke,
> > speed, lsd, whatever just to feel different. i don't know I spend half
> > my time being really healthy but I feel so tense inside that I need
> > something to let go and enjoy life. The times i spend sober I half
> > enjoy thinking i'm really engaging in life but underneath I know i'm
> > not fullfilled no matter how i try and fool myself.  I need more, i
> > want to cry on the alter and beg for release of this foolish escapade
> > of dillusion.  I just want to be a human being agian, a whole human
> > being fully here to enjoy life and to give to this world my full
> > potentail without being compimised by problems. i've tried so hard to
> > acomplish this but i've failed, i;ve failed again and again and yet
> > here I am hoping to find change, a new way. In my heart I  want to
> > find love and beauty and happiness shared but it's been so elusive
> > that I've felt like falling down and giving up.  The heart longs for
> > connection and understanding.
> >
> > Luke
> >
> >
> >  /]
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