[Ibogaine] Searching

Luke Christoffersen luke.christoffersen at gmail.com
Mon Jun 26 09:18:06 EDT 2006


Hi Sara,
            The drinks I had really hit me there the other night.  I
have to say I'm not always in such a cynical mood.  I do appreciate
allot of things in my life, and I thank God I'm not living in some
horrible place like Iraq or where they are staving and killing each
other.  On the other hand I feel alot of instense and overwhelming
emotionall pain and suffering from my childhood washing around inside
me each day which makes me miserable and incapacitated at times.  I
know that after my ibogaine treatments 4 years ago many repressed
feelings were opened up, some of which were not healed that I have
been struggling with since.
        What I said about drugs was just really the drink talking.  I
don't really feel any desire to seek out drugs.  I drink 90% of what I
used to years ago.  I did take alot of painkillers recently because
the tension and pain inside was preventing me from functioning
properly during a day when I had things that needed to be done.  I
think all of us who abuse drugs do so to ease their emotional pains
which if left undealt with will always plague our lives.  I know
ibogaine helped to heal some of my issues but the big demons are still
there looming inside.  I've been planning and thinking about doing an
ibogaine treatment to face these issues once and for all but have been
afraid.  Afraid of the unknown and afraid of my own feelings.

Luke

> >
> > Luke
> >
> > life is not everything.
> you could go to a very poor place on the planet where they don't have
> running clean water and hardly any food, then after few weeks there come
> back to your home and be happy with a hot shower and the food you have.
> you will start to appriciate what you have now when you miss it.
>
> Sara
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