Fw: completley off topic How to take a shower ...

Jasen Chamoun jasenhappy at optusnet.com.au
Tue Jun 6 03:39:33 EDT 2006



>>HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
>>
>>Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
>>lights and darks.
>>
>>Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
>>
>>If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>
>>Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more
>>sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
>>
>>Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide
>>loofah and pumice stone.
>>
>>Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
>>
>>Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>>
>>Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
>>
>>Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
>>
>>Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
>>
>>Rinse conditioner off hair.
>>
>>Shave armpits and legs.
>>
>>Turn off shower.
>>
>>Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
>>
>>Spray mold spots with Tilex.
>>
>>Get out of shower.
>>
>>Dry with towel the size of a small country.
>>Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
>>Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
>>
>>If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
>>Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a
>>pile.
>>Walk naked to the bathroom.
>>
>>If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo'
>>sound.
>>
>>Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
>>
>>Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
>>
>>Get in the shower.
>>Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
>>
>>Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>>
>>Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>>
>>Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>>
>>Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
>>
>>Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>>
>>Pee.
>>
>>Rinse off and get out of shower.
>>
>>Partially dry off.
>>
>>Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the
>>whole time.
>>
>>Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>>
>>Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>>
>>Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
>>
>>If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 
>>woo-woo'
>>sound again.
>>
>>Throw wet towel on bed.
>>---------------------------------------------------
>>
>>If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
>>there is something so very wrong with you.
>>
>>
>>Have a great day! And, "woo woo"!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>
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