[Ibogaine] ibogaine and scary fascism:Nick (long)

UUSEAN at aol.com UUSEAN at aol.com
Mon Jan 31 20:48:48 EST 2005


In a message dated 1/27/05 8:57:50 PM Eastern Standard Time, jfreed1 at umbc.edu 
writes:


> saying that government should coerce people into "positive" change in
> their lives IS periously close to what the nazis did to the jews, gypsies,
> homosexuals, disabled, and other undesirables of their time

Hey list,

Queer junkie with AIDS here.  This thread I must say first has been a blast. 
Haven't seen this much fire on this list in a good while.  Wild enough that it 
brought me out of lurking!

I feel I must throw my two cents in here for harm reduction. Personally, 
ibogaine was one of the finest moves I have ever made from a harm reduction 
prospective. When I joined this list, I had a raving crack addiction and a growing 
dope addiction.  Four months later I actually got ibogaine treatment. Kind of 
amazing really.

At the time, I had just started work with a harm reduction therapist. For the 
first time I felt that my choice to use or not use was largely in my power. I 
gave up on the drug is a drug is a drug attitude of NA, and smoked a hell of 
a lot of weed after ibogaine treatment.  My crack use became minimal, and 
remains so. I am no longer powerless over crack cocaine. Alleluia!

Underlying psychic pain remained with me however, and my heroin use grew. I 
found dope much more manageable than crack. I have gone back to work full time. 
I am paying off debts.

Meanwhile, I have struggled with success to keep my dope use to a happy 
medium. I am not physically addicted, and am working in therapy to free myself from 
the dirty diesel as well.

But on my terms.  On my timetable. I have largely cut loose from life 12 
steppers of any stripe, prohibitionists, and any other well meaning type who gets 
high off of "helping" me.  I am educating myself in harm reduction.  I am 
empowered. I use dope. I am moving toward quitting dope.  All on my terms.  

When I discovered ibogaine, I had no idea this is where my life would go. 
Perhaps my empowerment began with the ability to choose ibogaine in the first 
place. Not the cops, a lover, family....my choice.  I did agree to aftercare, 
which was not really so hard since I was already working a fine harm reduction 
therapist in NYC.  

Finally, I am no rush to use ibogaine again.  I am not physically addicted at 
this time, and see no point it really.  I am open-minded to another treatment 
down the line, however. I am not turned off by the insistence of providers of 
ibogaine that aftercare be sought.  As long as I have full say in the type of 
aftercare.  If one does have a problem with the aftercare "rule" , well, we 
are dealing with a schedule one in the US, so providers in the US are sadly put 
in the role of dealers. You want their serve, you at least pay lip service to 
their rules.  I would rather avoid ibogaine at this point. Instead, I am 
putting my energy toward working under the bigger umbrella of harm reduction, and 
work toward the legalization of ibogaine.  

Anyway, nice to be back on the list.  And thanks for this thread. 

Peace,
Sean
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