[Ibogaine] 10 weeks out

Kirsty Sutherland captkirk at kol.co.nz
Mon Jan 24 19:40:12 EST 2005

Hey cool, did I manage to fool you into thinking my life is a box of fluffy
ducks???? Wow!!  My life is a box of suicidal frothy ducks actually..... so
I come on here to get a break from it, and sometimes a giggle or two....
I can give you some misery every now n then if you prefer???
Luff a l'il bit...
Head nod in your direction...(not feeling huggy wuggy today)
Kirsty Dawn

-----Original Message-----
From: Jeffgd1 at aol.com [mailto:Jeffgd1 at aol.com] 
Sent: Monday, 24 January 2005 2:17 p.m.
To: ibogaine at mindvox.com
Subject: [Ibogaine] 10 weeks out

Hi Donna et al...
Well it has been a v-e-r-y slow but steady climb out of the 20 plus year
opiate haze...the last ten years being strictly a methadone diet. At 45
years old my brain had a lot of reconnecting to do with itself and my body. 
 I was on 50mgs when i did the ibo...looking back (ahh hindsight!) maybe i
should have tried switching to a shorter acting opiate but didnt have a
sympathetic Dr or want to go back to copping on the street
I went thru some very tough weeks post ibo i did a couple of "booster" doses
about 2-3 weeks out and the nor-ibo (or wheteever it is) was flowing bigtime
and gave me a great spirit  (just as advertised) and then about 7 weeks post
it simply dried up! I was still only about 75% back to'normal' and then it
became much more difficult to focus  on the positve.
Even now at 10 plus weeks  my energy level is still low (as it was before
ibo) and i am to put it simply, still, uncomfortable. Some nights i could
swear i am feeling honest to god (minor) withdrawal pain though i cannot
actually believe that i am at this point
I still try to focus on the fact that i am free now-to go and be wherever I
want (as soon as the $ are thier) and that compared to 20 years 10 weeks
aint but a drop in the bucket but it is hard.
I only chimed into the "ken" discussion cuz his posts seemed to hit  home
for me much more so than the full of positivity posts that i simply cant
relate to right now. I am only glad for those that feel great and see the
light so to speak but for me the road is still long. 
Dont get me wrong I am  a livemusiclovinglonghairedhippiefreak and all
that-no doubt!but I am out of the old school grateful dead model no
flowrpowerdaisyloving but hardpartyingbustyerballscraziness
-toomuchofeverythingisjustenuff shut-upandpassthetray-pipe-joint type 
To be fair I need to get out of the house more and excercise more and eat
better and get into counseling  and stop daydreaming so much and get moving
and eat better and excercise and get back to work and get a hobby and move
out of new york and meditate and join some kind of group and get back to my
spiritual needs and eat more vegatables and see a chiroprator and do some
volunteer work and  get rolfed or something and focus on the just how far I
have come but otherwise  everything is fucking great!
hope that helps 
Freak Freely!

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