[Ibogaine] RE: Ron, sweetheart....

Kirk captkirk at clear.net.nz
Tue Aug 2 02:04:33 EDT 2005

Thanks Krista, good to have back up....specially for our dearest Ron, he's
been a great input to this list for a long time... the good and the bad... a
very much valued member of this list..
But one thing is for sure, it doesn't' matter how much $ you have.. it
doesn't mean jack when you really don't like yourself or this world. The
trick is to put all the shit aside and learn how to love what you've got,
where you are at, and who you have on the journey.  I truly believe the only
reason I am here is my beloved daughter, Zoe. Really.
The most easiest w/d from drugs was when I had been on a course for a year
and a half, called Inner Growth and Spiritual Development.  At the Mentor
center (I think I have talked about the person who misheard me and asked,
aghast, what? Youre doing Inner Groping? At the Mental Center??????) Hehheh
well, I thought it summed things up really really well.
But omg what an easy detox. And yes true, it didn't last... I feel mostly
because the people running the courses decided to take them overseas ..
quite suddenly.. and I didn't know where to turn next. I am positive if I
had had some other form of group there and then.. I wouldn't be here now..
but then if everything happens for a reason then getting Ibogaine recognised
and happening in NZ is definitely it, cos when I am passionate about
something by Dog, look out it shall be known!! Ran into an old junky mate
who is working with the DIVO (drug and intravenous otago organisation) and
is very interested in this list etc.  So..... it's all good.
Ron... what are you passionate about? What do you really wanna do? It's
never too late, never envy anyone their youth....you can always reclaim it
at ANY time.
Love n hugs
To you to Krista
Kirk xxx

-----Original Message-----
From: Krista Vaughan [mailto:krista.vaughan at gmail.com] 
Sent: Tuesday, 2 August 2005 5:44 p.m.
To: ibogaine at mindvox.com
Subject: Re: [Ibogaine] RE: Ron, sweetheart....

I wanted to second everything in this msg :-) 

Ron aren't you a lawyer who at least has a roof over their head,
enough food, enough money for all your prescription drugs and a
computer with a internet connection? This puts you far ahead of most
street junkies.

Didn't you just do ibogaine a little while ago?

Not to put you down in any way (you're great at doing that to
yourself, even if I hated you I could never do half the job you do on
yourself). Ron, addiction is a big part of your problem and a lot of
people's to be sure, but have you ever considered doing anything at
all after ibogaine? Finding a group you can relate to, counseling, or
nothing at all related to drugs exactly but finding some kind of
self-image improvement program or book, anything!

I know you can't do any of those things because your family is sick or
dying, your job is too hard and it's better to keep beating yourself
up for no reason ;-) or any number of excuses you will come up with.

Ron, you're ok. Go look in the mirror, I'm good enough, I'm smart
enough, I'm ok. You are loved, try to love yourself only a little bit,
we promise not to tell anyone.


On 8/2/05, Kirk <captkirk at clear.net.nz> wrote:
> Ron, hope you are doing ok.
> Have you ever thought of doing some (dog forgive me for using the "lingo'
> but I feel it is needed here..) kind of positivity program? Changing your
> word speak, self image etc etc. You sound terminally cynical and negative.
> I think your last email to Preston was humorous, but to be honest was hard
> to tell..... no offence dear Ron, really!
> I just feel that you have gotten stuck in this position of everything is
> no matter what...and even to the point of affecting other people to leave
> this list?  Come on Ron, you expressed a valid opinion.. I think it was
> coinky dinks.. if not.... it doesn't matter, although I totally UNDERSTAND
> getting dumped on for your posts to here!! But all I have to do there is
> re-read the Welcome Mat and I feel ok again~! *kiss hugs to Patrick, who
> really truly does understand ;o)*
> Ron ron ron ron ron......i just wanna grab ya and show ya that it really
> isn't all bad.,..... I have my days... that's what it's all about.. I hate
> them,. But I have to force myself to look at the good the beautiful the
> awesomely neat that IS around us all. It's there take a look.........
> If I find something I feel might help your state of mind I'll send it, cos
> feel this is what keeps you where you are... not the drugs....they are a
> symptom to deeper shit well duh ok that might be obvious more obivious
> And im just guessing (and trying to see the pyter screen over a huge fat
> fluffy ct tail.. .... nosey buggers aint they??? Haaaaa GO WAY snowballs,
> don't want to see them1!!! LMAO)
> Urh yeh sorry
> Love to you Ron, really., keep posting....that much I have learnt.
> Hugs
> Kirk xxxxxxx

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