[ibogaine] day three!
mcorcoran27 at yahoo.com
Tue Aug 17 13:27:34 EDT 2004
Sean glad to hear your doing well. When I was using I was the cleanest guy I knew. Bed made everything where it should be... and maybe because I wanted to keep up the appearance of someone who had there shit together or maybe narcotics just put you in that state where all of a sudden you feel this incredible urge to change the room around or clean the windows from the outside. As if thats gonna somehow change how we feel inside.
NOW, I hate even going into my bedroom because it kinda looks like hurricane Charile made an unexpected stop. But to me the exact opposite is fine for right now. I know I'm gonna have to go home tomorrow and clean especially since I'm moving out at the end of the month but I'm doing it all in my own time. When I feel like the energy I'll try and if I don't then I will wait. And the funniest part is when I got home the place was immaculate but now it looks like a bomb when off. feel bad for my roommates but in the big scheme of things, not that big a deal either.
Get in touch with me through Preston. BTW- Your Dad is awesome. Your very lucky. -m.
UUSEAN at aol.com wrote:
How ya doin? One thing I found different about ibogaine versus other hallucinogens is that the hallucinations were closed eye. I could make them go away at any time by opening my eyes. This is a piece of control that I found really reassuring for the most part. So if the pictures are bothering you, you can open your eyes and they are simply gone. Close your eyes and you will see something else. I was told this is really common with ibo, and it proved true for me.
I wanted to go deep, though, I stuck though a lot when I could have looked the other way. I did open my eyes now and make some shit go away just cause I could. Isn't that why Clinton had sex with Monica?
Anyway, please keep posting your thoughts and concerns...there's a hell of lot of experience on this list.
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