UUSEAN at aol.com
UUSEAN at aol.com
Sun Aug 8 16:20:43 EDT 2004
I found your thoughts on whether "low bottom" addicts get recovery more
easily. I used to really believe that. My experience over time is no really
bearing that, however.
I mostly used with homeless, jobless 24/7 junkies for whom change would in
fact be an absolute miracle. They go in and out of Medicaid paid treatment, but
return to their old ways very quickly upon release.
Most of NA friends came into to the program with families, jobs,
homes...although usually when one or all of those things were at a breaking point..but
they still had them non the less. It seemed as if abstinence came easier to those
who had much to lose, but had not yet lost them.
As for me, this year I was homeless and jobless using in SanFransisco. Came
back to the New Jersey, went back to work, and moved in with family. My
partner of seven years packed up and moved to Conn., so my apartment was gone.
In this time I have started therapy and researched and may very soon be
getting an ibo treatment. I cleaned up entirely once in June, used again at the
end of July, and have been "chipping" since. I have to say, though, that having
a job, some friends, access to the Internet for this list and others, have
been crucial in my ability to turn things around at all. Hell, without the web,
I would not know about ibogaine.
So, my conclusion, while not very scientific, is that change (in this case
putting down H and crack) has come more possible because I have a job and home.
When I was a classic low bottom there was little hope for me at all. I have
incentive to change and mature. I'm not sleeping under an entrance ramp to the
Golden Gate having sold my food stamps for H or speed.
Thanks for letting me ramble.
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